oh dear

oh dear oh dear..
I'm rather drunken..
And and.. oh dear... just oh dear.
I told.. and I didn't really mean to.. and now someone else.. bah.. I didn't mean to but they guessed and then I couldn't lie.. and I expressed that I was the wanker one.. I did. Honest. I said I was the wanker several times.. I meant it. Like really.. this is the thing.. I don't think people get that I completely understand that I am the twat.. It has been said enough times, I have realised.. Do you get that? Because really.. I AM the cock.. I AM the worst one.. Kays? Good. Glad we got that sorted.

Shit I just ordered pizza..

I need to pack.

Why did I shot sherry? After shotting tequila? And just.. bleurgh. Too many alcoholic occurrences today..

Why haven't I packed?

I'm sorry.. I am actually...
Like really..

Why the shit have I ordered pizza?

Oh bugger...

Anyway. I feel bad for some reason and I don't know why.. except that I kinda do but don;t really understand why this exactly leads to me feeling bad and also why the fuck is he so offhand about mentioning my tendencies in normal conversation? like really.. kinda sensitive issue.. ish. I have to kinda keep an eye on where this goes. I know it has spread already but still.. I kinda want to be the one to break the news.. it's only fair.. know what I mean? oh god. I hate this. Like really.. why have I done this to myself? I could have pretended. I could have lied. So goddamn easily. argh.. fuck you. Fuck you for affecting me. And yeah.. You know what? I wish I could actually manage the length of conversation to express my happiness for you.. really. I'm being serious. I am happy for you. Yet I am way too socially awkward/retarded to manage it. I hate that I need reasons for everything these days. Everything has to have a goddamn reason. Why?! I could go one to ask more 'why' questions here.. but I know that it's because I need legitimacy.. I need some stupid physical, logical reason to communicate.. because speaking for the hell of it JUST DOESN'T HAPPEN now does it? And now I am so sleepy.. but I have pizza on the way and a whole stupid room to pack ad really why am I so stupid? I don't actually intend to be. I am sorry for fucking things up so intensely. I know I have. And I'm sorry for it. If there was anything I could do to make things decent I would. And I am aware that the ball season is gonna be fucking awkward.. Oh for fucks sake.. it's not worth it. Can;t you see that? Even I can. Fuck it.. Fuck it ALL./ I need to pack.

So mucht o pack
So little to say in a reasonably sober manner. But to summarise;
1- I am a TWAT
2- I am drunkish
3- I ordered pizza [why??]
4- I am a TWAT
5- I am sorry by the way.. about everything..
6- At times, I understand, at seldom times, I don't.. but Iw ant to 100%/ So just tell me. Thank you


~ocwer and out

[edit @ 00.04]
zomg the fake sound of progress.. it's been so long since I have heard this.. squee. ish. Still dunkish, but with the pizza this time. whoop.